When life give you Lemons…

You’ve all heard it, when life gives lemons you make lemonade…  RIGHT?

What lemons have I been given?

A LOT OF MOVING.

A C-section birth I NEVER wanted due to a cord prolapse, so incredibly emergent.

A Baby who wouldn’t/couldn’t latch well to breastfeed.

PTSD.

ECTOPIC pregnancy

Surgery

Miscarriage

Lots of Lemons…..

What am I doing with them, you might ask…

I feel like everything happens for a reason, it just does, I mean God has a much more grand plan for this planet and the people on it than what could ever happen to me, so sometimes bad things happen and I mourn, I cry, I suffer, but then I pick back up, learn whatever is possible (I never stop learning) from that situation, and then I use that to apply to other people and to help them through the situations for themselves.

And this is why you really should consider hiring me as your birth doula.  I’m not full of myself, but I’ve been working on this self respect thing, and yeah, if I’m honest I can actually say that it would be worth it for a number of people expecting their babies soon to actually think about hiring me.

As a doula I can say without a doubt, every woman needs a doula, and there is a perfect doula for every woman, but I’m not advertising for the other doulas just this second (though if I’m not the one for you I’d be happy to help find one that is perfect for you).

But here are the reasons you should hire me… listed out in lemonade

I’m not from here, I’m not from a lot of places, but I’ve lived in a lot of places, so maybe you are new to the area and you want someone who can understand where you are from… I’ve lived in Michigan, California, Oklahoma, New Zealand, Pennsylvania, Indiana, and North Carolina… that is a lot of places, and from that I’ve gained a pretty good understanding of a lot of different cultures, both in and out of the United States… (side note, I also hosted exchange students as a kid, so I learned a bit about Hungary, Germany, Japan, China, and Peru as well).

You are planning a beautiful un-medicated birth, or an epidural assisted delivery, or a scheduled c-section… yeah, I’ve been to births, and I’ve experienced them myself, I actually know how frightening it can be to experience it the first time, or to be experiencing it again after a time that wasn’t pleasant… Because my second was born by c-section and in a very big emergency, I didn’t have time to plan for the changes that happened around me, and my husband nearly passed out, so he wasn’t much help either. In that moment, don’t you think it would be great to have a reassuring hand to hold?  The hand of a woman who has been in a situation similar to your own?  This is in no way intended to mean that your birth wouldn’t be wonderful, but sometimes the unexpected happens, and if it did, you’d be well cared for with me.

So you planned to breastfeed, and things are not going well?  I understand, I’ve had a baby who just couldn’t get it right… I’ve dealt with the disappointment of not getting my baby to latch, I’ve dealt with the heartache when giving up the pump because it is painful and doesn’t produce the effect (milk) that you are hoping for.  If this happens to you, wouldn’t it be nice to know you are not the only one?  Lets hope it doesn’t, but the support of an understanding woman just might be helpful.. plus, since it happened to me I’ve done a lot to prevent it from ever happening again and learned a lot of really neat tricks along the way that might help you avoid giving up the dream.

After the birth of my second child went so far off course I struggled with my emotions and my actions, my mental health wasn’t good.  I thought I had PPD, but it turns out I was actually suffering from PTSD, my brain just wouldn’t stop replaying the moment when I felt my surgeon open my skin to take my baby out.  Mental problems after childbirth, no matter the cause, are serious, and I take them seriously.. My mom’s will know without a doubt that if they need help I’m there, if I can’t help I will find help for them.  I won’t play around when my mom’s are frustrated and it is taking a bit longer to get over it than it should, or when they are sleep deprived and need a rest, I’ll help them to get back to that sweet spot where they can relax and be taken seriously if they are struggling.

Some women wait to hire a doula until they are close to the end of their pregnancy, because maybe they don’t know they need one, or maybe they just figure a doula is there for just the birth of the baby… but to be honest pregnancy; the whole thing, is full of ups and downs, emotions, and fear, and excitement, and ALL THE THINGS!!!!  Because I’ve lost not one but two babies very early on I know how important early care is.  To have someone reassure you during those scary moments, or to cheer you on with your nutrition goals, or just to congratulate you at every milestone is pretty awesome, I’d love to do that with you!

And if things happen to take a turn for the worst and you lose your little one, due to ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage, or even late term loss, you don’t have to suffer in silence, there is another woman who would love to give you a hug, talk about the baby you were preparing to meet, and just plain love on you while you mourn this devastating loss.

Let me be your doula, let me celebrate with you, let me mourn with you, let me cheer you on, let me be a friend… it’s more than a job, it’s a calling.

I’ve been training my whole life for this job… and I’d love to help you in the transition of becoming the mother of THIS child.

Let my lemons be your lemonade.

Have a Cherished Birth.

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